Shuu Tsukiyama (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lasuaspada) wrote2014-12-05 07:51 pm
lasuaspada) wrote2014-12-05 07:51 pm
warmwood, evening 2; tsukiyama + banjou
[Tsukiyama doesn't return home immediately after the trial; rather, the first part of his evening is full of the sort of questionable life choices that lead to him getting violently ill immediately after he does. It'd been reckless, and he's aware that it's a bad idea to be spending time anywhere near someone possessed while he's in a less than ideal physical state, but at the same time he can't say that he can be bothered to care, and in its own way it had been entirely worth it.
After a while, however, he'd forced himself up and straightened himself up, and even if he's still looking...slightly disheveled he's more composed than he has been for the better part of the day, and when he finally finds Banjou he doesn't approach him properly. Instead he just leans up against the doorframe and watches him for a moment; when he finally speaks, his voice is perhaps surprisingly calm, even if his expression is a bit unnervingly blank.]
Why did you abstain?
[The question is straightforward; it's all he offers for now. No greeting, but not screaming insults either. Just a question.]
After a while, however, he'd forced himself up and straightened himself up, and even if he's still looking...slightly disheveled he's more composed than he has been for the better part of the day, and when he finally finds Banjou he doesn't approach him properly. Instead he just leans up against the doorframe and watches him for a moment; when he finally speaks, his voice is perhaps surprisingly calm, even if his expression is a bit unnervingly blank.]
Why did you abstain?
[The question is straightforward; it's all he offers for now. No greeting, but not screaming insults either. Just a question.]
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I have nothing but your word, after all.
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[He's completely serious.]
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[And there's where his voice cracks; he's quick to lower his head like he had in the trial, and he's bunching the fabric of his sleeves in his fists so tightly his knuckles are turning white.]
I've never believed in human sentimentality.
[His words are surprisingly quiet, given the source.]
Things like that...they're for the broken, or for weaker beings that don't know any better. I've never been weak, and I've never been broken. What does it matter to me if I lose people? One, ten, twenty, a hundred - did he tell you what I did to my "friends" at the restaurant I used to frequent? All of them, all of them meant nothing to me. I didn't care, why should I care? They were a necessary sacrifice and they were mine to give, so I did, and you know what, I felt nothing about it.
I don't ever feel anything about it, because I'm one of the strong in this world - it's my right to do this.
[He drags his arm across his eyes; he's still not looking up.]
But he's all I have. He's all I...have...and I don't know what I'm supposed to do if you take him from me...
[He shifts again, burying his hand in his hair; he pulls on it a bit, clearly trying to work some of the stress out.
It isn't working; his words are tight. Shaking.]
If you don't give him back at the end of this I'm going to kill you. I'm going to kill you and I'm going to burn his body myself. If I can't have him, you can't either.
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It's not a good look for a supposed demon. Maybe... maybe he can say it's Banjou's emotions again. It's the only lie he can use right now.]
It's alright, Shuu-san. I won't stop you.
I'm your "shield," I'll lay down my life for you.
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...Until I get in your way. Isn't that right...?
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Shuu-san, if the Maddened takes you out tonight, I will die tomorrow. I will try to discourage the other demons, but there are two other people who can target you.
If the worst happens, if you do not wake in the morning....
I won't be there to greet you when you awaken at the end.
[....]
This is goodbye, brother.
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[He breathes deeply; makes one more pass over his eyes before he looks up.
He's smiling when he does, though the expression is a bit distant.]
I hate you, you know. With all the passion I'm capable of, I hate you.
And if what you say is true, I hope that cuts you as deeply as it would him.
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He needs to keep his composure, but what can he do? He's going to die tomorrow. He's thrown his own brother under the bus, and he's probably doomed his entire group single-handed, just like he's done before.
Just like he always done.]
It's my fault you're losing your brother. I can let you talk to him one last time.
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Or you could just stop tormenting both of us and give him back, if you're capable of doing so at will. But fine. Let me see him.
[That smile is still present, dissonant though it is; it's obvious that he's trying to remain calm, and for the most part he seems to be succeeding.]
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He's already tired of this act.]
Shuu-san?
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[Something tightens in his chest then, in ways that he doesn't like; he tries to disregard it for now, to shake it off.
He'll be fine. He needs Banjou to believe that, at least.]
Are you all right?
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I'm... I'm okay, Shuu-san.
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I'm probably going to be struck down by someone tonight; they're going to make sure I don't wake up. But I promise I'll see you when I finally do, do you understand me?
And when I do, it's going to really be you. Do you believe me?
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He's aware of that, of course. It's what he wants, it's how he'll know he can protect Tsukiyama, but it's far from ideal.]
I believe you, Shuu-san.
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The gesture is almost tentative at first, his brow furrowing a bit as though he finds it strange and isn't entirely sure why; he shakes it off eventually, though. Smiles again.]
Have faith, Kazuichi-san. We were created to survive, and that's exactly what we're going to do.